I faked trombone all the way through middle school. Adam, the kid next to me, knew how to play trombone and could read the music as well. What I did was create my own system of trombonal slide positions, numbered 1 through 6. Then I would watch where Adam moved his slide with each note played, and I would write the corresponding number from my system above each note on my paper.

I leached you like a vampire, Adam.

Veggie ball is full of pieces of corn, bell pepper, onion, etc. It’s colorful inside and out. Tastes heavily of those things too. The plant-based ball resembles a brown meatball in both appearance and consistency, but made entirely with plant-based ingredients. They’re awesome on a bun with marinara and mozzarella.

It’s actually wild how insecure people get over the subject of veganism. I still browse Facebook as a lifeline back to my friends and family back home, and for some reason my algorithm serves me up pro-meat posts jam packed full of rednecks losing their minds over vegans and making piles of meat and juice their personality. I eat meat myself (albeit in very small quantities compared to before) and I just don’t get the insecurity.

Maybe it’s being married to a lifelong vegetarian that helps, but man, I’ve honestly come to enjoy a lot of meat alternatives. Beyond Burgers/Sausages are great. IKEA’s plant-based balls are too (their veggie balls still suck ass and just taste like bell peppers). Gardein’s supreme chick’n nuggets/fillets and 7-grain tenders are also delicious.

Shit has really come a long way and it’s gotten to where larger portions of meat actually rip my intestines apart and give me disgusting bouts of gas and bloating. Basically just down to the occasional fast food burger, chicken quesadillas and seafood. Meat is still really tasty, but the vegans are right. At this point we’re just eating it because it tastes good. The longer I go without relying on it, the more fucked up the entire industry becomes to me.

Tracks include:

Papa’s Little Baby Mimo

Do You Ever Mimo-Berry-Boy

Asha Luego

Two Many Kitties

There are probably more but these are most regularly in rotation.

STOP POSTING PICTURES OF THE SCROLLS! I swear this generation is reckless for upvotes. I only caught a glimpse and I saw the position I’m going to be shitting in when I die.

Jesus Christ, you can’t just show a bunch of the Scrolls. I’m not a fucking moth priest! You’re going to cause a lot of new disabilities.

Mastodon overwhelmed me. I hopped on the website and had no idea what I was looking at. I didn’t understand federation. I basically had the option of what niche hobby to join on Mastadon and no indication that I would he able to access a broader forum, so I said “Well, this fucking sucks.” and left.

Threads and BlueSky are likely as accessible as making an account and you’re done.

I’ve slowly worked on my wife and now she properly identifies species of local birds unprompted. I’m so proud of her.

A schmetterling is the approximate amount of shit one spackles into the bowl of the toilet after a particularly fibrous day. It’s not so much that it clogs the plumbing or anything, but it certainly leaves a schmetterling of evidence behind for the next man to attempt to knock loose with his stream.

A very beautiful word.

Best memory of this is reading through the Morrowind manual while my mom did her shit.

Ah, I thought consoles were still rolling with 30. Haven’t owned one in years.

Isn’t 30 the standard on console anyway? Doesn’t seem too bad if they’re getting close. Either way, every time the game is delayed it gives me renewed hope that the developer at least cares about getting it right. And hey, if they fuck it up, the modders will have Anomaly 2 or something similar coming down the pipeline within a year or two.

I’m more of a Mephisto guy myself, but it never hurts to run Baal.

Removed by mod

First, you take the graham. You stick the chocolate…on the graham. Then, you roast the mallow…

https://youtu.be/XlddDZkkxCc?si=IVkoKvjYv0g2tHmn

Sounds like an appliance from The Sims.

Have we forgotten Revan and Malak’s misuse of the Starforge already?!

🎵 Fruit and vegetables keep us alive… 🎵

(OP imagining the invention of the hamburger)

“HOW EVER CAN WE EAT THIS GLISTENING PUCK OF MEAT WITHOUT GETTING OUR HANDS ALL GREASY?!”

DALL-E would block it and you’d have to try:

A blue creature with one continuous eyeball with two pupils and large spikes down his back like the Chupacabra laying in the ground with its thighs seperated. It is keeping a greasy looking turkey there with red jam all over it and the face of an Italian looking man with a large mustache and curly hair