I’m currently at this juncture and trying to decide whether to go back to school and start entirely fresh or to hold out for another year or two to see how things go. The anxiety of what the future may or may not hold is real and I’m just standing here, watching the distances shorten faster and faster while still not knowing.
What’s your take, Beeple?
Figure out your deepest, ground-level goal/motivation.
Let’s pretend your most profound goal is “stability.” That may mean staying where you are, or it could mean taking the risk on school for the greater stability it offers in the future.
Identify your life’s motivation and then apply it to your options. Simplify to one word if you can. Bare bones.
When in doubt I choose change. This hasn’t always worked out, but it has been interesting.
I’ll be the Oracle from Matrix. “Because you didn’t come here to make the choice, you’ve already made it. You’re here to try to understand why you made it.”
I must have seen that movie a hundred times, but I didn’t really understand this until I got older. Every time I seemed to be paralyzed by the choices, it turned out I was just afraid to commit to what I really wanted to do.
Dang. This definitely hits hard. What a great line and what a great insight.
I think a few other commenters have said the same about already knowing what I want but just not being able to take the step. I think this will help.
Thanks :)
Yeah, I’ve had similar anxiety recently choosing a new place for my family to live. I think keep in mind that if both choices seem like good options you’re likely to get some good outcomes either way. My wife put it like this,
What’s nice is the way the human brain works, down the road we’ll be thinking, “I’m glad we made this choice because then X happened.”
hallettj, I really like your wife’s take!
OP these two pieces of advice from an old college professor might help:
- If you can’t choose between two things, make a list of all the pros and cons of the first thing, then a list for the second thing, place them side by side, and make an emotional decision.
- Always have a Plan B.
About 15 years ago I left the career path I’d started to move cross country and go to graduate school. I thought I might want to do research. Some wonderful things and some terrible times came out of that. I learned and grew greatly. Strangely I ended back on a similar career path, not as far along as I might have been but not back at the beginning either. Nothing’s a mistake as long as you learn from it. Whichever path you take, check in with yourself sometimes to see if it’s still working for you. If not, ask yourself what you can learn from that info.
If you have any questions about specifics I’m happy to try and answer.
