Wall monkeys on Amazon is a damn goldmine of really weird shit.
Other gems include:
Isn’t that the same woman who has a currently circulating stock photo with a very badly gripped .45?
Yeah. She gets around.
Fuck, I wish I had disposable income so I could buy these and surreptitiously post them up in my coworkers’ offices.
Asian Old Man is an investment. You buy him, put him up, then work extra hard to climb the latter so you don’t disappoint him. The you’ll have enough money for even more wall decals.
Just like the old saying, “It takes Asian Old Man to make Asian Old Man.”
He has a name! Have some damned respect!
Got to get in on that stock image craze.
Look at those reviews. People have been finding comfort in Asia Old Man for years.
Meh, middle aged at best. Amazon will inflate descriptions just to get a sale.
The original SKU with amazing reviews
Theme: Religion
“So, what religion are you?”
“Asian Old Man.”
I love that it’s “Amazon’s Choice”
How delightfully weird! It’s stock art for walls. Like something you’d see at a pharmacy or realtors office.
My coworker and I are currently trying to devise a good spot to hide this in the office. Like behind a door with the head poking out, or inside of a rarely used cabinet. When I tell you that my soul would momentarily exit my body as soon as I saw it out of the corner of my eye…
Pro tip. Find a spot in a conference room where it appears on video, but where someone might not notice it when they walk into the room and turn on the camera. Like behind a structural support beam or something.
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I’m holding out for Harold.
